


Numbered Days

by jacobperalta



Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Zombie Apocalypse, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff, Read at Your Own Risk, bechloe - Freeform, it gets sad folks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-22
Updated: 2019-12-22
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:00:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21894031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jacobperalta/pseuds/jacobperalta
Summary: "The street was empty except for a few cars with dead people in it, she frowned at the disgusting smell. She would never get used to it. The end of the world, if you could call it that, started exactly 398 days ago. Beca knew because counting days was the only way to keep her sane. After seeing the world completely turn to shit, the small brunette soon realized that getting bitten wasn’t the only way to lose her mind, so she started counting the days."ORBeca and Chloe fight zombies together and they look good doing it.
Relationships: Chloe Beale & Beca Mitchell, Chloe Beale/Beca Mitchell
Comments: 8
Kudos: 50





	Numbered Days

**117 days before**

Beca woke up by a loud thud on the door. She reached instantly to the machete she had on the nightstand and was up in seconds. She heard grunting noises on the other side and she closed her eyes for a second, trying to keep her calm. The brunette walked slowly towards the door and within seconds, opened it and her weapon hit the walker directly in the eye. She watched him hit the floor and released her breath. 

“Shit.”

She had to move quickly, there was probably a lot of others coming, she wasn’t going to make the same mistake again. She quickly gathered her small amount of things, not forgetting a small handgun, a knife, her machete and stole some food that hadn’t gone bad yet from the cupboard of the stranger’s house she was staying in. After putting everything in her bag, she left.

The street was empty except for a few cars with dead people in it, she frowned at the disgusting smell. She would never get used to it. The end of the world, if you could call it that, started exactly 398 days ago. Beca knew because counting days was the only way to keep her sane. After seeing the world completely turn to shit, the small brunette soon realized that getting bitten wasn’t the only way to lose her mind, so she started counting the days. She had been alone for 165 days, losing Stacie, her only best friend, on day 233. Beca felt her throat tighten just thinking of her former friend.

Stacie had been the only one for her even before the apocalypse started. Beca lost her mother to cancer at 7 years old and then her father kicked her out of his house when she came out as gay when she was 16. Stacie’s family had treated her like their daughter. The tall brunette was the only one who could make  _ the  _ Beca Mitchell smile and forget that she was angry at the world for a moment. She got bitten when they were running from walkers. They had gotten carried away at an empty grocery store, thinking they were alone and Stacie couldn’t run fast enough that time. Everytime Beca closed her eyes, she still saw herself raising her gun to kill the only person in the entire world who she loved and she still saw Stacie’s eyes filled with tears.

_ “You have to do this, Beca. I don’t want to become crazy and eat other people. Please do it. I love you so much and I can’t stand the fact that I could ever try hurt you.” _

Beca shook her head trying to get rid of the tears and the thoughts. She couldn’t afford to cry, especially not right now. She knew she didn’t have enough supply to last long and she needed to find a safe place.

She walked for a long time, her feet aching at every step when she saw a large green sign.  _ “Welcome to Atlanta”. _

Beca snorted, no smile on her face, “Welcome to Atlanta, can’t wait to see another population trying to eat me and not in the way I usually like.”

**107 days before**

10 days had passed since Beca had entered Atlanta. She had walked most of the time, trying to find a safe place where she could rest for a few days. She was now in an university campus, Barden was the name of the school she thinks, she didn’t really pay attention. It looked safe enough. Beca had killed a few walkers when she first got there but not too much that she couldn’t handle them. The trick was getting them in the eyes, it killed them instantly. Well, she wasn’t sure if killed was the right word since technically they’re already dead. This whole apocalypse thing was still a mystery to Beca if she had to be honest.

When it started, it started mainly in California. Everywhere in the news was those reports of people becoming sick and starting to bit people. Scarily enough, it spread everywhere and now you couldn’t go anywhere without someone trying to bite you. Stacie and Beca, being the intelligent young adults they were, started training immediately. They had learned how to handle machetes, knives and guns and various weapons. They had started working on their cardio and how to fight.

_ “Why cardio?” Beca said with a frown. _

_ “Because, Becs, if those things start running after us, you’ll want to be faster than them.”  _

__

Turns out Stacie had been right because if they hadn’t trained this hard, they would have been dead by now- well,  **Beca** would have been dead  **too** by now.

**100 days before**

7 days since she discovered the campus, she was still there. There was running showers, beds and food. Beca hugged herself to warm herself up. It was the end of october and the wind was becoming more cold everyday and her leather jacket would soon not be hot enough for the weather. 

She woke up with a grunt, her watch read 8:17 am. It was early but she could already feel how hungry she was. She hadn’t eaten since yesterday morning and her body was starting to feel it, she felt weak. She sighed.

“Guess I’m going to the grocery store again.” She said out loud to no one. Another sigh. Beca wished her entire life to be left alone because people had only brought her pain but now that she was really alone, she desperately wanted someone. Turns out being alone wasn’t that fun, especially when you have to kill zombies every now and then. 

She was singing to herself quietly while walking on the street, wishing she still had her headphones and she could at least have music in this shitty world. 

“You shout it out”

Beca began shaking her head to the beat

“But I can’t hear a word you say”

Her fingers were twitching, wishing she was on her laptop making a mix right now.

“I’m talking loud not saying much” 

She heard a grunt behind her. 

“That’s not the next line, dude” she turned around and met a walker. She expected to see someone her height but her eyes dropped down to meet a small boy. “Oh no come on.” 

She hated killing children. It reminded her everyday that the world had really gone to shit. I mean she wasn’t their biggest fan when they’re alive but who said:  _ hey you know what’d be fun? Humans becoming zombies and trying to kill each other and force the remaining humans to kill them, including children!  _ That was fucked up and even though Beca’s like a specialist in fucked up things, that was just too much.

She remembered what was happening at the right time because she caught him before he was about to bit her. She quickly knifed the kid and turned around, trying to forget what she had just done. Apart from the boy, the area seemed clear so she entered the store without any more fuss. 

“Hey!” She shouted, “If anyone’s here to kill me, can you do it right now because I’m really hungry and I don’t have all day.”

She waited, not moving, to see if she would hear the sound of a walker walking towards her but when she heard nothing, she started walking around.

A lot of the food had already gone bad but she managed to found enough to last for a few weeks. Unknowingly, she had started singing again, Titanium still stuck in her head.

“I’m bulletproof nothing to lose. Fire away, fire aw-“

The brunette was interrupted by a loud scream coming from the back of the store. Her hand instantly reached the knife in her back pocket and she ran towards the noise. She opened the back door and saw a walker on top of a woman screaming loudly. Without thinking twice, Beca jumped on the young walker and rolled with him away from the other woman. The walker seemed skillful because he made her lose her knife and he had the upper hand on Beca for a moment, almost biting her. Trying to keep his mouth from anywhere near her body, she looked around, trying to find something to help her with when she saw her gun on the floor and the woman next to it. She seemed frozen in place and only answered when Beca started yelling at her. 

“Throw me the fucking gun!” 

“Right! Sorry!” She threw it and Beca catched it easily and without a doubt, pulled the trigger on the walker and she felt his lifeless body drop on her. She pushed him off with a grunt and got up. She quickly checked her body to see if she had any bites she could have missed and when she saw none, she sighed with relief. It’s when the other woman spoke that the young woman remembered she wasn’t alone.

“Oh my God! You just saved my life.”

“Oh. Don’t worry about it, dude.” Beca said with a shrug.

“You just saved my life.” The girl repeated and then Beca felt arms around her. Caught by surprise, she backed away quickly.

“Not a big hugger.” When she finally looked up and saw what the woman looked like, the brunette felt her heart tug. She was beautiful, maybe the most beautiful woman Beca had ever met. Her face was covered in dirt from the fight but she still looked pretty. She had red hair that were put in a messy bun and her clothes looked way too big for her, she was wearing a red flannel on top of a blue blouse that looked worned out but Beca understood why since they were literally living the apocalypse.

The girl didn’t seem fazed at all from Beca’s rejection. “I’m Chloe. Chloe Beale. I don’t even know how to thank you.”

Beca sighed. She didn’t want to know the woman’s name because now she technically knew her and after Stacie, no matter how much she craved talking to someone, Beca didn’t want to get close to another person. Not when everything could end any minute. There was too much pain.

“Beca. Listen, you don’t have to thank me in any way. I’ll just go one my way and you’ll go on yours.”

“No, listen you can’t leave! I don’t know where my best friend is, we told each other we’d meet here at 9 am but she’s still not there and I’m so scared. What if she got bitten? Oh my aca God, she’s dead and I wasn’t there to save her. I don’t even have a weapon, I just have this wooden baseball bat and-“

“Dude!” Beca interrupted. “I’m sorry your best friend is not there but I can’t help you and I have to get back before any more walkers get here.” The brunette started walking away but the redhead unfortunately followed her.

“Walkers?”

“Yeah. Those zombies dudes? That’s what we call them.”

“We?”

Beca sighed and closed her eyes. “I meant me.”

“That’s a weird mistake to ma-“ 

Beca suddenly put her hand on Chloe’s mouth. “Shh.”

They waited for a moment and Beca cursed when she heard familiar grunts coming from outside the store.

“Fuck.”

“Do you think there’s a lot of them?” 

“I don’t know. Stay there.” Beca didn’t know why she felt the need to protect Chloe, it wasn’t like she’d stay with her after. The brunette shook those thoughts out before it was too late and opened the door carefully to look outside. For what seemed like the hundredth time, she sighed. Without making any noises, she closed the door and went back to Chloe who was anxiously waiting.

“So?”

“There’s a least six of them, which is way too much for us.” She passed a hand through her hair, trying to think of something. “Okay here’s the plan. I think I saw a motorcycle one the parking lot, I know how to drive one. I’m gonna try to make it work. Meanwhile, I’ll give you my gun and you’ll try to kill them.”

“Right. Good plan. One problem though.”

“What?” 

“I don’t know how to shoot a gun.” The taller woman looked guilty.

“It’s the end of the world and you don’t know how to shoot a fucking gun?”

“A gun seemed way too intense. Maybe they still have feelings inside and they can feel pain, we don’t know.”

Beca rolled her eyes. “Dude. Okay whatever I’ll show you.” 

After being way too close to the other woman to show her how a gun works (how can she smell so good during the goddamn apocalypse?), they were finally ready. 

“One, two, three, GO!” They pushed the door open and instantly all the walkers turned to them. One was directly right in front of them and Beca managed to skillfully hit her with her machete, she then ran to the motorcycle, leaving Chloe to deal with the five other walkers that were coming awfully close to them.

She heard a lot of gunshots and she looked up to see two of the walkers down.

“Not bad, Red!”

She made two wires touched and the motorcycle roared.

“Fuck yes! Come on Beale!”

She jumped on it and Chloe followed her quickly. Two strong arms tightened their way around her stomach and they were off.

The entire ride back to Barden, Beca tried to shake off the feeling of Chloe’s arms around her and how good it felt. It was just because she hadn’t seen another human being in a long time, that’s just it.

When they got there, Chloe looked inexplicably happy.

“I’ve always wanted to go there! I heard they have an amazing acapella team.”

Beca almost choked on her spit. “Acapella? Lame.”

“Acapella is not lame! It’s music created all from our mouths!”

“Yikes.”

Once again, the red head didn’t seem fazed by Beca’s negative reaction. “I love signing. My ex-boyfriend Tom said that sometime I sing in my sleep.” She chuckled. “Do you sing?”

“I don’t.” And before she thought about it, she asked, “Where’s Tom now?”

Chloe dropped her smiled instantly and Beca knew what she was going to say.

“He’s dead. He got bitten really early on.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine, I’m over it. I miss him, though.” She was quiet for a moment before speaking up again. “What about you? Lost anyone? You did mention a ‘we’.”

“That was a mistake, I meant just me.” Beca said coldly. She didn’t know why she felt like telling the stranger every one of her secret so she tried to stop herself before she could.  _ “Make her leave as soon as possible.”  _ Beca thought to herself.

“There’s shower at the end of the hallway if you want to clean yourself and after I can give you a ride back to your friend.”

A disappointed look was apparent on the redhead’s face and Beca felt a tug in her stomach, knowing she caused her to be sad but she ignored it.

“Oh. Thanks.” 

Beca decided to spend the time, going through what food she had taken back at the store. She was singing quietly again when Chloe walked in again.

“You can sing!”

“Dude!” She yelped and turn around to see an almost naked Chloe Beale. Her hair was still dripping from the shower and she only had a small towel around her. She was definitely the hottest woman she had ever met and oh god, Beca was so gay.

“You were singing Titanium, right?”

“You know David Guetta?” Beca couldn’t help but smile.

“Have I been living under a rock? That song is my jam. My  _ lady _ jam.” Thank God Beca was already sitting because she would have fell down at the wink that Chloe gave her after saying  **that.**

She cleared her throat awkwardly, “this makes sense.”

Beca isn’t sure how it happened but they’re suddenly singing together and damn, they sound  **good.** Chloe is looking at her with those bright blue eyes and she’s smiling and Beca can already feel herself letting all her guards down. Fuck.

**99 days** **before**

So Chloe had stayed for the night. Beca wasn’t planning on it but after singing with her, she didn’t want to just drop the redhead off and leave her alone. They made plans to come back to the grocery store and look around for her best friend. It’s the least that Beca could do. Hopefully they’d find Aubrey before it was too late (Beca’s not sure that too late means before her friend gets bitten or before she catches feelings for the bubbly girl).

Turns out Chloe is a morning person, not that Beca isn’t surprised. At 9am, Beca woke up by her singing. 

“I hopped off the plane at LAX with a dream and my cardigan”

Beca tried opening her eyes but was immediately blinded by the light.

“Welcome to the land of fame excess whoa, am I gonna fit in”

The small brunette groaned and hid her head in the pillow. The sound made Chloe stop.

“Oh! You’re awake, finally!”

Beca heard her footsteps approaching and then the redhead was sitting down next to her and caressing her hair. Beca usually didn’t like people touching her hair but she couldn’t resist Chloe, not when it felt this good to be close to another human being.

The brunette finally opened her eyes to look at Chloe and was surprised when she saw her only wearing a bra.

“Whoa!” Beca yelped and turned around, feeling like she saw something she shouldn’t have.

“It’s okay, you can look. I’m pretty confident about all this.”

Slowly, the brunette turned her head to look at her but kept her gaze directly on Chloe’s face.

“You should be.” Beca smirked and Chloe winked. Were they flirting now? “Why are you in a bra, though?”

“Well, I woke up early and decided to try to get the dirt off my clothes since we have water here and now they’re drying.”

“Right.” Beca focused again on the hand that was still caressing her hair and relaxed. She could get used to this.

Later that day, they looked for Aubrey everywhere. They went back to the grocery store which was obviously empty except for a few walkers and Chloe brought her to their old hideout which was empty as well. Beca will never forget the look of sadness that Chloe was sporting, she couldn’t even imagine how stressful it must be to not know if your best friend was still alive or not. 

Chloe didn’t talk for the rest of the day and Beca didn’t either. Weird how now that she had met Chloe, the silence felt suffocating.

**83 days before**

Day 432 of the apocalypse. 199 days without Stacie and 17 days since she had met Chloe Beale. Every day for sixteen days, they had gone back to the store to see if Aubrey would be there. Everytime, she wouldn’t be and Chloe would get sad. Sometimes for a few hours then she’d get back to being the happy and bubbly redhead that she is but sometimes on the harder days, she wouldn’t talk for the rest of the day, like today.

It was 9pm and they had gone to the store at 3pm. Chloe hadn’t spoken since they came back from and she had refused to eat. Beca probably wouldn’t have cared if this anyone else but since it was Chloe and in those short days they had spent together, Beca found herself liking the older girl’s company a lot. 

She really wanted to be there for Chloe. She’d do anything to hear her voice again and see her smile. Slowly, she went to the dorm her and Chloe shared and frowned when she saw the light off. Was she already asleep? Her answer was quickly answered when she heard Chloe crying softly, Beca felt her heart break. She hesitated a little before laying down next to Chloe, a small space between them.

“You know,” Beca whispered, “I lost someone too. Her name was Stacie. She was my best friend. 

She was looking straight ahead at the ceiling but she felt Chloe turn to look at her. She took a deep breath before continuing.

“Tomorrow will mark my 200th day without her. She’s always been there for me, even when the entire world seemed against me, she was there.”

There was a pause before Chloe asked.

“What happened?”

“She got bitten. We were foolish and we didn’t think to check if the area was clear before entering a store and next thing we knew, dozens of walkers were chasing us. One bit her and—“ Beca’s voice cracked, her throat tightened. “I had to kill her. She didn’t want to turn. She asked me to kill her. And I did. And the sight still haunts me everyday.”

Warm tears were falling down Beca’s cheek and Chloe got closer to her, cuddling her. Her soft hand wiped Beca’s tears and she left a quick kiss on her shoulder.

“I’m sorry.”

No words were spoken for the rest of the night and they fell asleep in each other’s arms. This time Beca didn’t mind the silence.

**80 days before**

“Hey, what day is it?”

“Day 432 of the apocalypse and day 20 since we met.” Beca answered without hesitation. 

“I meant what day in November we are but this is much more interesting.” Chloe got closer to Beca, smiling.

The brunette narrowed her eyes, “what is?”

“This whole number thing how do you know all this?”

“Oh it’s not that interesting. I just realized that counting the days is a way to keep sane. Especially when Stacie left, I think the only reason why I didn’t go completely nuts is because I counted everything.”

“And you count the days since we met?” Chloe was smirking like she knew something Beca didn’t. “That’s cute.”

“Nothing I do is cute, Beale. Remember that.”

“Right. You’re a badass, I almost forgot.” The redhead winked.

**75 days before**

Most days were boring. They had nothing to do all day, the only interesting thing happening was them leaving to look for Aubrey for an hour everyday. When they came back empty handed for the 24th time, they both sighed as they collapsed on their beds. 

“I’m going to take a shower.” Chloe said.

Beca’s eyes followed her until she was out of sight and she released a breath she didn’t know she was holding. She really liked the girl. She was adorable and funny and gorgeous and she always knew the right thing to say to Beca. It almost made her forget that they both could die at any minute. 

She couldn’t act on her feelings, she already promised herself she wouldn’t get close to anyone else and she fucked that up, she can’t afford another mistake.

Beca was foolish to think she wouldn’t get close to Chloe, it was inevitable. A scream broke her train of thoughts and the brunette ran to the showers.

“Chloe!”

She quickly found where they were and saw a walker attacking the redhead and without hesitating, jumped on it. She grabbed the pocket knife and skillfully stabbed it in the eye. She winced at the sound it made and the blood on her hands and sighed. 

Chloe must have grabbed the towel when Beca was fighting the walker because when the latter turned to check up on her, she was covered. She was completely paralyzed, barely blinking. The small woman walked up to her slowly, careful not to make any sudden moves.

“You okay?” She whispered, Chloe nodded but it was barely visible. “Did you get bitten?” 

“I don’t think so.” 

“Okay.” Beca sighed with relief, “that’s good.”

“It was so close to biting me, though. God, Becs. I can’t even imagine what would’ve happened if you weren’t there.”

“The important thing is that you’re safe. Holy fuck, Beale you gave me quite a scare.”

The ginger cracked a small smile. “I seem to be doing that a lot.”

Beca snorted, “yeah, you’re going to give me a heart attack one day.”

Chloe laughed shortly but suddenly stopped to look at the girl in front of her seriously.

“Thank you.” Before Beca could do anything, the older woman gave her a long kiss on the cheek and hugged her tightly. They stood like that for a while, Beca’s cheek still burning from the kiss.

They decided that it was safer from them to leave, from experience, they knew one walker actually meant a lot of others on their way. They gathered their small amount of supplies and took off. 

Beca tried to not think of the way the redhead’s arms felt around her waist but she was having lots of difficulties not getting distracted. Chloe was gripping her tightly and whispering to herself to calm her down, obviously scared of being on a motorcycle. 

Beca decided to pull over for a moment before the other woman could hurt her stomach permanently.

“You okay, Red?” She asked softly.

The girl bit her lip anxiously, “I’m kinda...really scared right now.”

“Yeah, I got that.” Beca chuckled, “But you don’t have to be scared, I’m right there and I’d never let anything hurt you.” The brunette looked at the ground nervously, red covering up her pale cheeks.

“Aw, Becs, you  **do** care about me!” 

The smaller woman rolled her eyes, “you wish, Beale.”

The redhead only grinned in answer and the brunette was about to turn around to keep driving when she heard a voice calling out.

“Help!” A male voice screamed with a thick accent.

They turned around in shock to see a group of walkers around a figure on the ground and before Beca could even say the word ‘wait’, Chloe ran to help them.

“Fuck.” Beca immediately chasing after her. 

When she arrived a man was desperately kicking left and right to keep walkers from biting him. Chloe had been able to kill one but they were too many and while the two women were busy trying to kill others, they heard a deadly scream and they both looked down to see the man clutching his neck, screaming.

Chloe rushed to him, taking off her jacket to cover the wound and she was trying to calm him down but he wouldn’t stop screaming. Beca killed the last walker and kneeled down next to them.

Wild eyes suddenly looked at Beca and she almost backed away but the ginger pulled her back. 

“How do we help him?”

“I—“ Beca tried to speak but no words were coming out.

“Aidez-moi! Aidez-moi!” the Frenchman yelled.

“Vous devez vous calmez, je ne peux rien faire quand vous criez comme cela!”

The brunette looked at the redhead with shock, “you know French?” The ginger shrugged.

“What is he saying?”

“He’s telling us to help him and I told him that he needs to calm down, we can’t do anything while he’s screaming like that.”

“Je sais ce que vous devez faire, tuez moi. S’il vous plaît, je ne veux pas devenir comme eux.”

Beca looked curiously at Chloe and she translated,

“I know what you need to do, kill me. Please, I don’t want to become like them.”

Beca’s heart missed a beat and she looked at the man laying next to her. He was looking at her with a pained expression, pleading her mercy. Her eyes hardened and she turned back to Chloe.

“Go back to the motorcycle.”

“But Beca—“

“ **I said** go back to the motorcycle, Chloe.” Beca cut her off sharply. The redhead opened her mouth to speak again but closed it when she saw how serious the younger woman was. 

Beca looked back at the man who was looking at the interaction, still covering his neck with the bloody jacket.

“Do you understand English?” The man nodded, “Good. So what I’m going to do is use my knife, okay?” The man nodded again. “I know exactly where to put it without it hurting too much, you’ll barely feel a thing, okay?” Another nod. “Here we go.”

Beca’s hand was shaking while reaching out to her back pocket to get the knife and her breath was raggedy. She took a few breaths, trying to calm down and pressed the knife to his neck.

The stranger looked deeply into her eyes, “Merci.” 

Beca’s heart skipped a beat and slowly entered the knife into his neck, his face looked in pain for a few seconds but by the time she got the knife out, lifeless eyes were staring at her.

She cleaned the blade and walked back to the motorcycle. She felt completely numb. Not sad or disappointed or even disgusted, she just felt… numb.

The redhead was waiting there, chewing her lip anxiously. When she saw the smaller woman arrive she made a move to hug her but Beca just ignored it.

“Let’s go.” She said with a neutral tone.

Chloe hesitated, “you did what you had to do, Becs.”

_ Yeah,  _ she thought,  _ I probably did do the right thing, doesn’t mean I didn’t just kill someone. For the second time. _

Instead she just repeated the same words, “let’s go.”

This time, Chloe didn’t say anything, she just climbed on behind Beca, wrapping careful arms around her like if she squeezed too hard it would break her. The brunette took a deep breath and without any second thought, started driving.

**74 days before**

They drove all night in silence. It was day 441 of the apocalypse and November 17th. The air was chilly and Beca and Chloe were freezing. The leather jacket and flannel weren’t nearly enough to cover them. At one point, the ginger had fallen asleep. Her head was laying on the back of Beca’s neck and the latter would have loved it if the imagine of lifeless eyes blankly staring at her wasn’t burned in her mind.

It had to be done but it doesn’t erase the fact that Beca  _ killed _ him. She killed him as easily as she would have done any walker, but the man wasn’t a zombie, he was a real human being who felt pain when she slid the blade in his neck. She hated that she had to do it but the thought of Chloe having to do that was maybe even more painful. The girl was definitely the sweetest person Beca had ever met and the brunette knows she would have done anything to protect her, even if it meant killing a man and keeping the pain to herself.

The girl never thought of herself as a knight in shining armor but she would gladly become one for Chloe. A smile like that was worth a lifetime of pain.

“Becs.” A voice pulled her out of her thoughts.

“Mhm?”

“How are you?” Chloe’s voice was so sincere and concerned that Beca couldn’t even think about lying.

They were currently at a rest stop, getting more gas for the motorcycle.

“I don’t know honestly.” 

“I’m here for you. I know it doesn’t mean a lot and I can’t even imagine what you’re going through right now but I need you to know that I’m here.”

Beca’s heart was beating so loudly that she was scared that Chloe could hear it. She was falling. Hard. She could almost hear her subconscious telling her:  _ what did you think would happen? _

She wanted to scream at the redhead's face “Thank you for not looking at me the way I look at myself. Thank you for being so nice even when I don’t deserve it and thank you for giving the best hugs. I like you so much. I think I’m falling in love with you.”

But all she said was, “I… thank you.” 

Chloe, used to Beca’s lack of words, just smiled that smile of hers and suddenly all the bad thoughts in the brunette’s mind shut down and all that was there was Chloe.

**70 days before**

They finally found a somewhat safe shelter in an abandoned little town. These past four days had been mostly spent in silence. Beca would drive all day and night because it wasn’t as though she could sleep anyways. She knew Chloe was worried for her well being but Beca couldn’t bring herself to say anything to reassure the redhead. When they weren’t driving, they were relaxing in silence, eating canned food that frankly tasted disgusting but Beca was just glad they weren’t going to starve to death. Beca had lived through 445 days of the apocalypse, she wasn’t going to die because she was hungry. Beca was a badass and if she had to die, she was going to die like a badass. She remembered mentioning that to Chloe once as a joke and the older woman had been so offended. 

_ “Beca Mitchell stop talking about your death.” Chloe said with a frown. _

_ Beca had laughed and shrugged, ‘“I’m just saying. Stacie didn’t make me train like a madman only for me to die a lame death. I better go out with a bang.”  _

_ Chloe’s frown deepened and she smacked the brunette on her shoulder.  _

_ “You’re not allowed to die at all. I need you to protect me.”  _

_ Beca had looked at Chloe who was looking at the sunrise with a pensive smile. Beca felt her heart tug at the words.  _

_ “Okay.” was all she said and Chloe had turned to look at her and smiled.  _

So yeah, Beca was glad she had food because she needed to stay alive. For Chloe. They settled in the small farm house and she looks at Chloe as the ginger admired the house. The woman must have felt her stare because she turned around to make eye contact and Beca gulped. It was getting harder to ignore her attraction to Chloe these days because the girl was an immense flirt and also, that smile. God, that smile was going to kill Beca one day. 

“I’m-- I’m going to go take a quick look around the house. Make sure we’re safe here.” She stammered and before Chloe could answer, she left the room. 

She took a deep breath once she got outside and shivered. The temperature was dropping fast and they desperately needed warmer clothes. Thankfully the house seemed to have a fireplace so they could stay warm on cold nights. Beca picked up a few pieces of chopped woods to bring inside and made sure no walkers seemed to be around. The house was a cute little yellow house which seemed to belong to a happy couple with a few kids. The shed in the back had farming tools that could come in handy sometimes. Beca took an axe and a pitchfork. she grabbed some rope and she was about to go inside, show Chloe what she found when she heard a branch snap outside. She stopped everything and listened to see if she heard anything else. She grabbed the knife from her back pocket and held her breath, carefully stepping outside the shed. 

She took tentative steps, careful not to step on anything that makes sound when she heard another sound coming from a bush. She felt a shiver down her back and she approached the bush cautiously. Suddenly, the thing that made the noise jumped out of the bush and Beca screamed as she swinged the knife in the air. Her heart beating hard against her chest, adrenaline pumping in her veins as she looked around with wide eyes. She finally caught sight of a little squirrel who was biting on a nut like nothing happened. 

“You motherfucker.” Beca said to the animal and the squirrel looked at her and she felt as though it was mocking her. She stuck her tongue out at it and the animal just went back to it’s snack. Beca sighs and runs her finger through her hair.    
  
“I’m going insane.” she exclaimed out loud and then realized what she did. “Speaking to no one is the first sign of insanity. Get it together, Mitchell.” she shook her head and rubbed her face, trying to get herself back together. She hadn’t slept more than 10 hours in these last four days and she really needed it. 

She entered through the back door and dropped all her findings on the kitchen table. The clutter must have alerted Chloe because the ginger’s voice through the house sounded shaky “Beca?” 

“Yeah, sorry it’s me.” She said as she examined the wood to make sure it’d be able to keep a fire going. Chloe’s footsteps got closer and closer.

“This house is amazing, Becs. It has a basement and a game room and-- woah where did you find all of this?” Chloe questioned as she finally reached the kitchen. 

Beca smiled proudly, “They had a shed full of tools. I can’t believe no one else found this place. It’s great.” Chloe nodded in agreement. 

“Yeah, I love it. I’ve always wanted a little house like this. It’s nice and cozy.” 

Beca grabbed some wood and walked to the living room where the fireplace is, Chloe following behind as she talked.

“My plan was to go to the city for a few years. Maybe New York City. I would’ve met the love of my life there and after a few years, we would’ve found a little house for us and our kids to grow up in and they would’ve moved out when they were older, leaving me and my partner alone to grow old together.” 

Beca started working on the fire, “That sounds perfect, Chlo.”

Chloe sat on the couch and brought her knees to her chin and smiled sadly. “Yeah, but it’s not going to happen now.” Beca let out a yelp of joy when she finally got the fire going and she turned to face Chloe.

“Why not?” She said without thinking and Chloe rolls her eyes. 

“Beca.” 

The small woman sighed and got up to sit next to Chloe. The girl extended her legs to rest them on top of Beca’s lap and the brunette rested her hands on her knees. 

“I mean it. Why not? Just pretend this is it.” 

Chloe’s face looked puzzled. “Pretend this is what?”

“Pretend this is your house. You’ve lived an amazing life in New York City, found the love of your life, popped a few children who are now off to college as we speak and you’re allowed to grow old in this very house. Look around, this is yours now.” She said, gesturing around. 

Chloe’s face was pensive for a long time. She just looked at Beca with so much intensity, the girl felt as though Chloe could see into her soul. Finally, Chloe reached and took one of Beca’s hand in hers. 

“Does that mean you’re the love of my life in this fantasy?” Chloe said in a small voice and Beca took a sharp breath. She hadn’t realized that’s what she implied when she said that. 

“I--” Beca tried to say but she doesn’t know what to say. Her entire body was yelling at her to say “yes” but she didn’t think she has the strength to do so. Thankfully, Chloe spoke up again. 

“I like that.” 

Beca gulped, “Yeah?” Chloe nodded.

“Yeah.” Chloe scooted closer and leaned in and for a moment, Beca thought she was going to kiss her but the redhead lightly kissed her cheek and laid her head on Beca’s shoulder. “Thanks, Becs. You always know what to say.” 

Beca’s heart was pounding hard in her chest. She breathed Chloe in and they hadn’t showered in a few days so the girl smelled like dirt and sweat but she didn’t mind. Everything in her body was screaming at her to tell the girl on her lap she loved her but then Stacie’s face flashed into her mind and the last words she told Beca are yelled into her mind. They were loud and they sounded desperate and it was making Beca go crazy. 

_ “Please do it. I love you so much and I can’t stand the fact that I could ever try hurt you. I love you so much and I can’t stand the fact that I could ever try hurt you. I love you so much and I can’t stand the fact that I could ever try hurt you.” _ Then the sound of a gun shot loud in Beca’s ear. She could still feel her ears ringing and the scream she let out when Stacie’s body hit the ground. The way she had screamed until her throat was scratchy and hurt to the point where she couldn’t say anything. 

“Becs?” A melodic voices pulled her out of her thoughts. “Are you okay?” 

Beca blinked at her and nodded “Yeah, of course.” She looked away but she could feel the redhead’s stare on her. She focused on the flames dancing in front of her eyes and after a while, Chloe rested her head on her shoulder again and they stay silent for the rest of the night. 

**69 days before**

They both fell asleep on the couch without meaning to and Beca woke up with her neck hurting and at least ten knots in her back. She didn’t know how but she ended up on her back with Chloe sprawled on top of her. She remembered their conversation from yesterday and she wondered whether Chloe liked the idea of the fantasy as a whole or especially the part about Beca being the love of her life. 

She shook the thought of her head quickly and slid out of under Chloe, careful not to wake her. She opened a can of vegetables and looked at the sun outside through the window in the kitchen, trying to forget the awful taste. She stopped eating halfway through to make sure to leave some for Chloe and she sighed, resting her head again the wall. 

She had to do something about this stupid crush. Okay it wasn’t stupid and also it was more than a crush. But whatever, that wasn’t the point. This was the apocalypse. She can’t afford to fall in love with someone. Love is dumb and it makes people do dumb shit and she can’t afford to be stupid while their lives are in possible danger every second. She looked at Chloe, still sleeping on the couch and she felt her heart tug. The redhead was just simply beautiful. There was just no other way to describe her. Well, okay that was a lie because Chloe was also kind and fun and gorgeous and just her smile could make flowers grow in winter. 

Beca sighed and look through the window again and wait..was that? Was that a well? Holy shit she loved this little farm house. She went outside in a hurry and ran through the backyard because the air was frisky and she couldn’t stay too long outside in her leather jacket. The house didn’t have running water so a well could benefit them a lot. By the way the house looked and the way they kept the well clean, Beca guessed the family hadn’t been gone for too long so this was a good sign that she would find clean water and if they were lucky, food that hadn’t gone bad yet in the cupboards. 

She almost screamed of joy when she noticed the well worked. She looked at the water and it looked clean enough. She put the bucket down and did a little celebratory dance. They could fill their water bottles and clean themselves with this water. It was a blessing come from up above. She picked up the bucket once again and when she turned back to the house, she saw Chloe looking at her through the window with an eyebrow raised. Beca felt her cheeks heat up in embarrassment that Chloe had seen her little dance and she entered the house. 

“That was cute.” Chloe teased and Beca put down the heavy bucket full of water.

“Shut up, Beale.” She tried to sound threatening but clearly failed since Chloe laughed.

“No, I mean it. How does it go again?” And she tried to imitate what Beca just did which only embarrassed Beca more. She covered her face with her hands.

“Please stop.” She said with her hands still covering her face and Chloe giggled and took her hands in hers. 

“Alright, I’m stopping.” She said with a smile and looked at the bucket and pointed it with her chin, “What’s that?” 

Beca smiled proudly, “This, my lady, is clean water.” Chloe’s eyes widened.

“No way!” 

“Yes way.” Beca said and she watched as Chloe jumped up and down and clapped. 

“Beca Mitchell, you are my hero.” Chloe said as she went to get glasses for them to drink out of. Beca hoped the blush on her face wasn’t too obvious. She just liked the idea of being Chloe’s hero, okay? Who can blame her?

**64 days before**

451 days since the apocalypse started. 218 days since she lost Stacie. 36 days since she met Chloe. That was 182 spent alone. She had spent 182 days fighting walkers alone and she had survived. Then she met Chloe and she fell in love with her in the spawn of 36 little days. It was dumb and foolish and Beca hated herself for it. 

She officially knew she was in love with the redhead on the morning of the 451th day. She woke up on her side and it took her awhile to understand what was happening but eventually she understood, Chloe was currently spooning her. As in Beca was the little spoon and that wasn’t something that happened. When Stacie and her cuddled for warmth, even though Stacie was way taller than her, Beca was the big spoon. That was how Beca liked it. Though, as she woke up and felt Chloe’s protective arm over her waist and felt her warm breath on the back of the neck. She didn’t mind. She actually really liked it. She liked the way Chloe had her hair buried in dark hair and the way her hand was just underneath Beca’s boob, she just had to move it up a bit and it would be directly on it. She tried to move and Chloe just held her tighter, forbidding her to move and who was Beca to deny her that? 

She managed to turn around without waking up the redhead and she let her finger graze Chloe’s perfect jawline. She held her breath as she watched the older woman inhale and exhale in a certain rhythm. 

Chloe smelled of the dish soap that they used to clean themselves from the water coming from the well. It smelled a bit like apples and Beca didn’t mind it. She looked at Chloe’s parted lips and she imagined kissing them for a second. She imagined how perfect her lips would fit against hers. She almost leaned in but stopped herself before well the girl was asleep, for fuck’s sake.

She finally slipped out of bed to go see if she can hunt a few more squirrels that had been around the area. She didn’t like killing the little animals but it was meat and well they were desperate for any kind of food. They could only take so much canned vegetables. 

Chloe had hated it the first time Beca brought home a dead squirrel. Beca doesn’t think she’d ever seen the ginger this distraught before as she yelled at Beca for being so insensitive and killing such an innocent animal. The smaller woman just blinked and took all of it in, not reacting. She didn’t like yelling. It reminded her of her father who always used to yell and it reminded her of the nights she couldn’t sleep because her parents were too busy shouting downstairs. Chloe had seemed to noticed Beca’s expression because an hour later as Beca was cooking it in the fireplace, Chloe had sat down next to her. 

_ “I’m sorry. I don’t usually yell.” Chloe said, looking at the fire.  _

_ “S’okay.” Beca shrugged.  _

_ Chloe turned to look at her, “No it’s not. It was a great idea.” She nudged to the squirrel in the fire. “I shouldn’t have yelled.”  _

_ Beca turned to her and she could see the guilt in Chloe’s eyes. “Thank you for apologizing.” she said honestly and Chloe had bit her lip anxiously, making the brunette look at her lips. _

_ “Do you want to talk about it?” The taller woman said after a while and Beca shrugged.  _

_ “Not really.”  _

_ “Please.”  _

_ Beca sighed and looked back at the squirrel slowly cooking. “There’s nothing much to tell. It’s just that yelling was a big part of my childhood. My parents… well my dad was always yelling at my mother and it was hard sometimes.” She didn’t have the guts to look at Chloe. She couldn’t believe she was even opening up right now. “I got used to the silence, you know? So hearing yelling again took me by surprise.” _

_ “I shouldn’t have yelled. It was stupid.” Chloe said again and Beca took the squirrel out of the fire.  _

_ “Don’t worry about it, Red. I’m a big girl. I can take it.”  _

_ Chloe had giggled and nudged Beca with her shoulder. “I know. I just want to be the protector sometimes too, you know?” She teased and Beca had smiled _

_ “I got that covered.” Beca said smugly and the smile on Chloe’s face was priceless. She would protect Chloe till the end, she thought.  _

At this rate, Beca would probably give her life for Chloe. That was why she hated that she was head over heels for Chloe. Because being in love made you do crazy things, like die to save another and that wasn’t something that she should think about in the midst of an apocalypse. 

At least now when Beca brought home a squirrel, Chloe didn’t say anything. 

**55 days before**

A scream woke up Beca from her nap and she was up in a flash, running towards the sound. She took her gun that was laying on the nightstand and made sure her knife was in her pocket.

“Chloe!” She yelled, hoping to death the older woman was okay. 

“In here!” The melodic voice answered and Beca burst in the room, the gun locked and loaded in her hands. 

Chloe didn’t even seem to notice the gun and grinned, “Look!” She pointed to the cupboard behind her. There was a least a dozen bottle of alcohol, from rum to whiskey to tequila. She sighed in relief. 

“Holy shit, Chlo. Don’t scream like that again, I thought you were in danger.” Beca said as she put back the gun and allowed herself to calm down. 

“Sorry.” The ginger giggled and pointed again. “I’ve been dying to have a drink in months. We are so getting drunk tonight, Becs.” 

Beca almost said no but she looked at Chloe’s smile and decided against it. She didn’t know if it were really safe to get drunk in the middle of an apocalypse but like Chloe, she had been craving alcohol in a while. Just to feel the freedom that alcohol gave you, not to feel the weight of the end of the world on her shoulders.

Several hours later, they found themselves in the living room. Beca had light up a fire before so they were watching it, taking sips of the hard liquor every once in a while. Chloe was way drunker than Beca and it was a really funny thing to witness. The girl kept talking about her childhood but Beca could barely understand a thing because Chloe kept giggling throughout and also because the redhead was sitting really close to Beca, like practically on her lap. 

Chloe was talking and Beca should feel bad that she wasn’t listening but she was just too amazed by Chloe. She looked at her red fiery hair that was in competition with the fire next to them. The blue eyes reflected the flames, as if the sea was burning. She looked at her lips that were grinning as they were moving. Beca gulped and took another big sip of her drink, not moving her eyes from Chloe’s lips. All she wanted to do was to attach her lips to hers and to feel what it really felt like to kiss Chloe Beale. 

“Becs.”The nickname pulled the DJ out of her thoughts. 

“Hm?” She answered absently, still looking at her mouth.

“Do it.” 

Beca frowned and looked back her eyes, “Do what?” It was almost scary how serious Chloe looked.

“Kiss me.” 

“I--What?” Beca stammered, not sure she heard that right.

Chloe wet her lips, “Kiss me.” She simply repeated and Beca was sure she heard it right that time. 

“You’re-- you’re drunk.” Beca said and everything in her body was telling her to shut up but she really didn’t want to take advantage of Chloe. 

The redhead smiled softly, “Maybe I am, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want you to kiss me.”

“Chlo--” Beca started but Chloe cut her off by pressing their lips together. She felt a strong hand on the back of her neck and another tangled in her hair. She finally closed her eyes and started kissing back and God, did it feel good.

She imagined this happening at least a hundred times but nothing was as good as the real thing. Chloe’s lips were full and soft and they fit so well between Beca’s lips. Chloe licked her bottom lip so Beca would give her access into her mouth and the DJ was happy to oblige. Chloe slid her tongue in Beca’s mouth and she lightly sucked on Beca’s tongue. The brunette let out a moan at the feeling and Chloe practically crawled on her lap. Chloe lightly tugged on her hair and it drove Beca even more insane. She finally realized her hands were still in the air so she put them on Chloe’s waist and the latter almost grinded on her lap. 

Beca still couldn’t believe she was kissing Chloe. She felt a fire in her, bigger and hotter than the one next to them. She tasted a bit like alcohol but Beca didn’t mind. She just let her hands wander everywhere on Chloe’s body, enjoying it while it lasted. After what seemed like forever, Chloe was the first one to pull away. Beca knew Chloe was looking at her but she didn’t have the guts to open her eyes because if she did, then the moment would truly be over and she didn’t want it to end.

Beca felt a finger on her chin and she opened her eyes. Blue orbs were staring at her with so much intensity, it sent a shiver down her spine. 

“Hi.” Chloe said, biting her bottom lip and Beca was hypnotized. 

“Hey.” She muttered. 

Chloe opened her mouth but was interrupted when Beca yawned. She grinned and got up, thus leaving Beca’s lap. The brunette immediately missed the warmth. 

“Let’s go to bed. It’s late.” Chloe said, while putting out the fire. Beca nodded even though the ginger’s back was facing her. She still couldn’t believe what happened really happened. It felt like a dream, like Beca was going to wake up any moment now. Instead, Chloe took her hand and dragged her to their room, where Chloe fell asleep in seconds, safely tucked in Beca’s arms. 

Yeah, apparently they were cuddling too now.

**48 days before**

It had been a week since the kiss. One full week. Beca knew because counting was her speciality it seemed like. 460 days in the apocalypse and on the 50th day of meeting Chloe, they had kissed.

And that was a week ago.

They didn’t talk about it.

It wasn’t an awkward thing as much as well Chloe didn’t bring it up so Beca didn’t either. The brunette honestly thought Chloe just didn’t remember it and it almost made her feel awful. Did she take advantage of Chloe because she was drunk? Though, the ginger had clearly said she still wanted to kiss Beca even if she was drunk. Also it was hard for Beca to really regret it. She didn’t remember the last time she kissed someone as Chloe. It felt like pure heaven. 

But it had been a week since they kissed and Chloe didn’t bring it up. So Beca didn’t either. 

**35 days before**

They’d been at this house for over a month now. Chloe and Beca had fell into a certain rhythm that she actually loved but would never say it loud. It was okay, though, because she knew Chloe still knew she loved it. 

That was the thing with Chloe. She always seemed to know what Beca was thinking and it scared the DJ. She was so used to everyone giving up on her because they couldn’t figure her out. Because she was quiet and had walls up so people didn’t really try to get to know her. Chloe had came out of nowhere and had figured her out in an instant.

Beca was probably doomed from the moment she heard that scream in that grocery store.

Chloe who was so kind even though there was hell on Earth. Chloe who didn’t want to kill walkers or squirrels because they might have feelings. Chloe who lost her best friend that day in that grocery store and still talked about her like they were going to meet up soon again. Chloe who woke up with a smile on her face and who cheered up Beca on her worse days. Who held Beca when Stacie’s face haunted her in her dreams and she woke up with a scream. Who didn’t ask her any questions because she knew Beca didn’t want to answer them. 

How could she not fall in love with her?

Usually, Chloe would wake up earlier than Beca. She’d try to be quiet as long as she could but she always ended up singing which woke her up or simply she’d get bored and jump on Beca so the latter could give her attention. 

Today was different, though. When Beca woke up at around 10:30, Chloe was on her side, her back facing Beca and she seemed still asleep. 

“Chlo?” Beca whispered but there was no answer. Confused, she got up, already missing the way Chloe smiled at her in the morning and sang “Good morning, Becs” while handing her breakfast. 

A couple hours later, when Beca had fought the cold to barricade the back of the house and brought some more clean water, she noticed Chloe still wasn’t up. She looked at the time and it was well past noon. Even when they had late nights, Chloe never slept past lunch. It just wasn’t her thing. Chloe loved to be awake. She loved being up and talking to people and dancing and singing and she hated lying down for too long. Which ironically, was the total opposite from Beca.

Beca carefully went upstairs without too much noise. When she got in the room they shared, Chloe was still in the same position as when Beca woke up. Beca frowned and slowly slid under the covers next to Chloe. The girl didn’t even budge as if she didn’t notice anything. Though, Beca knew she wasn’t sleeping anymore. She had slept enough times in the same bed to know how the ginger sounded when she was asleep and so right now, Beca knew she was awake. 

“Hey you.” She murmured. No answer. Beca frowned again. 

“Are you sick?” She tried again. “I can go see if we have some medicine in the bathroom.” She made a move to leave but an arm caught hers just in time. The redhead didn’t turn around or said anything but at least Beca knew Chloe wanted her there. Chloe tugged on her arm a bit and the smaller woman knew what it meant. She turned on her side and cautiously put her arm over Chloe’s waist. She buried her face in red hair and inhaled the scent that was Chloe Beale. 

They stayed silent for a while. Beca wasn’t sure she’d know what to say even if she wanted to break the silence. The last time she had experienced a silent Chloe was back at the dorms in the university in Atlanta, which was more than a month ago. Beca was even closed to drifting to sleep, so comfortable with Chloe in her eyes when Chloe spoke for the first time. 

“It’s his birthday today.” Her voice was rough and it almost sounded as if she had been crying. It took awhile for Beca to remember. 

“Tom?” 

Chloe nodded. Beca held her tighter and it was silent again. 

“He wasn’t the best boyfriend but he tried, you know?” Chloe took a deep breath, like she trying to control herself. “He was nice enough and he was handsome. I loved him. At least I thought I did. I don’t know. Everything is so confusing now.” 

“Yeah.” Beca answered breathlessly and she found herself dumb for this reply but Chloe turned in her arms and suddenly their faces were inches apart. The ginger’s eyes were red and puffed. She had clearly been crying and it broke Beca’s heart in a thousand pieces. 

“I miss him. I miss everyone. This sucks.” 

It almost took Beca by surprise. Everyone just kind of ignored the way they were surrounded by death all day long, no one really talked about it out loud. Except talking about Stacie and Aubrey, they didn’t really mention the whole ‘this didn’t used to be our lives before’. It was easier to forget you had parents, families, friends before all of this started. It was kind of a silent understanding everyone followed because when you said out loud, that made it real.

Beca bit her lip, she didn’t know whether to ask questions or to say nothing, she didn’t want to make Chloe cry again. She isn’t sure she could handle the sight of the bubbly girl in tears.

Chloe closed her eyes. “I wish everything was like before. I miss my mom. I miss my dad. I miss my best friends, my boyfriend, my friends.” Beca just shifted her arm around Chloe’s waist which made her open her eyes. “Don’t you?” 

The DJ hesitated and sighed, “Well my mom died when I was 7. I’m almost glad she died before this shitshow, though. My dad threw me out of the house at 16 for being gay and I haven’t talked to him in years, so no I don’t miss him. I don’t wish his death.. I just don’t miss him. I miss Stacie, though. She was the only family I ever had.” 

Chloe buried her face in Beca’s neck and the latter didn’t know if she was hallucinating when she felt the soft press of lips on her skin. Then, she heard it. 

“I’ll be your family.” 

Beca smiled despite herself, “That sounds great, Chlo.” They fall into a silence again but this time it’s comfortable and Beca just focused on holding Chloe.

**31 days before**

“Hey we forgot to celebrate Christmas.” Chloe suddenly called out when they were both sprawled over the couch reading some books they found. Their legs were intertwined in the middle and the whole thing felt incredibly domestic. Beca could almost forget what was happening outside of these walls at the very moment. 

Beca looked up from her book to meet Chloe’s blue eyes. “It’s not like there’s really anything to celebrate anyways.” 

Chloe frowned and closed her book, “We have to celebrate Christmas, Becs.”

“Chlo, we’re more than a month late.” 

“Doesn’t matter. Come on.” She said while pulling Beca’s legs so they’ll sit closer and Beca is almost immediately overwhelmed by their closeness. 

She ducked her head to avoid the redhead’s intense stare. 

“Close your eyes.” Chloe said and Beca frowned and looked at her.

“What? No.” 

Chloe rolled her eyes, “You have to close your eyes so I can give you your gift, silly.” 

“Where in the hell did you find a gift?” Beca said and she watched Chloe sigh impatiently.

“Becs, close your eyes already.”

“Fine.” 

She closed her eyes and felt Chloe shift next to her. She felt Chloe scoot even closer, almost sitting on her lap and then, she felt soft lips against hers. She opened her eyes in shock but Chloe had them closed in front of her. Beca was still too shocked to kiss back so the ginger sighed against her lips and bit her bottom lip. This immediately woke Beca up, who started to kiss back and Chloe moaned when Beca licked her bottom lip. The DJ was a little bit more confident this time, especially since it was her gift, she could enjoy it if she wanted to. 

She tangled her hands in red hair and Beca felt hands slip under shirt, gently stroking her stomach. The older woman pulled away for a second only to change position and went straight back to kissing with a whimper. Chloe gently pushed Beca so she’d lay on her back, with Chloe on top of her. She felt hands traveling everywhere on her body and her entire skin was on fire. When Chloe put a gentle hand just under her boob, alarms started going off in her mind and she pulled away. Chloe immediately backed up and ran her fingers through her hair, probably trying to calm herself down. 

Beca sat up and tried to ignore the warmth in the pit of her stomach. Chloe was looking at her with an emotion Beca couldn’t figure out and it was almost scary. The ginger licked her bottom lip and Beca gulped.

“Thank you for the gift.” The brunette said lamely and she instantly regretted it.  _ What kind of weirdo says that after their crush makes out with them? _

Chloe giggled and put her hand on Beca’s knee, “You’re welcome, Becs” She winked and Beca felt her mouth get dry. It was crazy what that woman could do to Beca. 

**30 days before**

Beca liked Chloe. Okay, she loved her. A lot. Once again, they didn’t really talked about the kiss but when Beca woke up the day after in Chloe’s arms. She swore she felt Chloe drop a kiss on her shoulder before getting up.

And when she had handed a can of peas to Beca when the latter finally got up, she had let their hands brush for way longer than necessary and winked at her. Beca’s stomach must have flipped a dozen times at that moment but she forced herself to eat the food, pretending she wasn’t freaking out inside.

She wasn’t sure she was doing a very good job because Chloe kept winking at her and since the start of the day, the girl had kissed her cheek 3 times. Which made Beca’s face heat up and go even redder than tomatoes. 

Beca wasn’t sure what they were at this point. It had been 68 days since they met and she had grown to really know the other woman. It also helped that Chloe wore her heart on her sleeves and was never afraid to show her emotions. Beca, though, knew Chloe could read her just as well. She had spent all those years building these walls only for Chloe to get through them like they weren’t even there. She wasn’t sure how’d that happen but she was also not sure she really minded that much. 

And when Chloe leaned down to kiss her cheek to say goodnight but accidentally missed and kissed the corner of her mouth, Beca really didn’t mind. 

**20 days before**

They were running out of food. They had been here for 50 days cautiously counting their portions to last the longer possible, but it was becoming harder to eat enough as to not be too hungry and still have food for long. But the cupboards were getting emptier and emptier everyday and they needed more food. The animals around their area had all been killed or had hidden away to hibernate for the winter so they had to limit themselves to what the house had from before. Which wasn’t a lot. 

“Chloe just let me go!” Beca shouted, running her fingers through her hair angrily.

“No Beca. I forbid you from going!” Chloe said, her hands on her hips.

“Chloe we need more food. I’m telling you I saw a store not too far from here. I’ll be back in less than two hours.”

This didn’t seem to calm the ginger down, “Two hours? A lot can happen in two hours. What if you die and I don’t even know it because I’m at home waiting for you to come back like an idiot?” 

“Well if I’m not back in two hours, you’ll know I’m dead so you won’t for me.” Beca rolled her eyes and Chloe’s jaw dropped.

“Are you fucking kidding me, Beca?” The girl rarely cursed and the way she pronounced it scared her and if she was being honest with herself, slightly turned her on. “Stop talking about dying. I hate it when you do that.” 

“Chloe I’m just being honest here, okay? But I don’t plan on dying. I’ll make it back in one piece, I promise. You know me, right? You know I can handle myself.” 

Chloe bit her lip anxiously and crossed her arms. “I’m coming with you.” Beca huffed.

“I already told you no, Chlo. It’ll be easier if I’m alone.” 

“I’m not letting you go out there alone, Becs!” 

The DJ rubbed her face with her hands, “I spent 182 days fighting walkers alone before I met you, Chloe. I can handle myself.” 

“I don’t care. You have me now so you’re not going alone.” 

Beca ended up going alone. Chloe had hated it but Beca was stubborn and she wasn’t going to put Chloe in trouble for no reason. The store Beca had seen not to far from their house was a 7/11. So far they had been pretty lucky in this town so Beca was grateful but she also didn’t want to jinx it. 

The store was a mess and stank of death so she wouldn’t be surprised to find a couple bodies in the back store so she wasn’t going to wander back there. The shelves were thrown on the floor and a couple of things were smashed. She stepped over some glass and went further in the store. Magazines and packets of cigarettes were thrown all over the floor and every step Beca took was sticky but she didn’t dare to try to figure out what caused that. Lots of the food at gone bad and smelled almost worse than the dead bodies that Beca had been surrounded by so she didn’t even try to figure out if they were still eatable. It took awhile but she managed to find some rations that could keep them alive for a little more time. Beca checked her watch. She had only been gone for 45 minutes but she knew that Chloe was anxiously pacing around the house, waiting for the DJ to come back so Beca shouldn’t waste more time. 

Of course, it was at that moment that she heard it. That groan coming from afar that only meant a walker was nearby. 

She sighed and went to reach her pocket knife and her eyes widened when her hand came up empty. The knife wasn’t there. She had her gun but the gunshot would be loud and just bring more walkers to the area and she didn’t need that. She turned around and saw the walker. It seemed to be someone more or less her age but the guy was way taller than her. He was limping outside the door but he hadn’t seem to notice her yet. She held her breath and looked at the door that led to the backroom. It probably had another exit there but she didn’t want to risk it and get stuck in an even smaller room. 

She honestly didn’t know what to do because she forgot her knife like a stupid person at home and the walker was right in front of the door so she wouldn’t be able to sneak out without him noticing. She really didn’t want to use her gun and obviously she didn’t have a phone to call for help. She was suddenly glad Chloe wasn’t there because she knew it was going to be dangerous and if one of them was going to die, it was going to be Beca. Without breaking eye contact with the walker, she took a few steps backwards and ended up falling against one of the few shelves that were still standing, which caused it to knock it down and dragged Beca down with it. 

She yelped as the shelves made a big noise and she fell on some broken glass. She felt a sting on her arm and noticed three large cuts on her arm. 

“Fuck.” She mumbled to herself already feeling weak from the wounds. She looked at the door and the walker had definitely heard it and pushed himself on the door so it opened. It almost seemed as though he smiled when he saw Beca laying on the floor and dragged his broken foot along has he walked towards her slowly but surely. She tried to get up but she probably hurt her ankle while falling because when she put weight on it, it shot a wave of pain throughout her whole body.

She threw the first thing she saw at his face but obviously, it didn’t even make him budge. Then she stretched herself and used all the strength in her body to push a shelf that was already on the floor to trip him. It made him stumble onto the floor but the victory didn’t last long because he just started crawling towards her. He let out a groan and reached to grab Beca’s foot but she dodged it and kicked him in the face. 

Now that he was close she could clearly see how ugly he was. It was missing an eye and a part of his nose had been bitten off and he looked… rotten. She gagged at the sight and also the smell oozing out of him. He reached again and grabbed her ankle. She struggled into he let go and she looked everywhere to see if anything could help her. He grabbed her calf and pulled on it and suddenly she was way too close to him for comfort. He opened his mouth and before she knew it, her hand blindly grabbed a piece of glass from behind her and stabbed him in the eyes as his mouth was dangerously close to biting a piece of her thigh off. 

She felt blood splashing on her face and she took the piece of glass off and watched as his lifeless body fell on her legs. She could still feel her heart beat fast and the blood pumping in her veins. It’s when she let go of the glass that she noticed that the glass had slice the palm of her hand a bit. She sighed.  _ Well that had gone well. _

After taking a few deep breath, she got up and ignored the pain in her ankle. She picked up her bag full of food and looked at her arm who was bleeding uncontrollably. The glass had cut through her leather jacket and had pierced her skin and blood was all over her sleeve. She sat down on her motorcycle and winced when her injured palm met the handle. 

The whole ride back all she thought about was Chloe’s reaction to her injuries. Was there a way she could hide them from the older woman? Beca laughed at herself. There was no way Chloe wasn’t going to check if Beca was okay the minute she got back and she would probably get very mad when she’d see the injuries. She was already annoyed when Beca left so when she’d see she got hurt when Beca said she wouldn’t, she can’t imagine how angry the fiery redhead would be. 

She finally made it back home and looked at the time. At least Chloe wouldn’t be mad about the time since she made it back soon enough. She opened the door carefully, trying not to make any noise. She was tired and all wanted to lay in bed but she knew if she ran into the redhead, she wouldn’t be able to sleep anytime soon. Thankfully, the girl was not in the living room. She knew she didn’t have the strength to go upstairs to their room so she just let herself fall on the couch and she could almost hear her ankle thanking her. 

She was about to fall asleep when she heard a loud gasp and a pillow hitting her face. 

“What the fuck?” She yelped and sat up, almost dizzy. 

“Beca Mitchell!” Chloe almost yelled and Beca winced before laying back down. “What happened?” She grabbed the smaller woman’s injured arm and she hissed at the pain and Chloe let go immediately. 

“I ran into a walker.” She said casually, closing her eyes and Chloe smacked her on the shoulder.

“Did it bite you?” 

“Of course not. Who do you think I am?” Chloe shot her a look, “Shut up. I forgot my knife--” Chloe gasped dramatically and Beca cringed, “Yeah, yeah I know, I was dumb but I managed to find some broken glass and it might have cut me a little but I’m fine, see?”

Chloe rolled her eyes, “Oh yeah you look absolutely marvelous with your arm cut open. Come on, I’m gonna clean you up.” She put her arm around Beca’s waist and when Beca winced when she put weight on her ankle, she looked at her in anger but didn’t say anything.

The entire time Chloe cleaned up the DJ, she ranted, “I just can’t believe you would be so careless, Beca. I already didn’t want you to go alone and you said you would be fine and then you forgot your knife like an amateur? You could’ve died! I knew I should’ve came with you. I’m never going to let you leave alone again. I cannot believe you could’ve been so careless and--” 

Beca cut her off by kissing her. The ginger was shocked for a moment but kissed back as soon as she realized what was going on. The kiss was a bit different from the others, it was needy and desperate. Like Chloe was trying to show her concern for Beca with her mouth and the younger woman did all she could to kiss her back with the same intensity, proving to Chloe she was fine. Chloe tangled her hands in Beca’s hands as if she’d disappear at any moment. Beca was the first one to pull away and rested her forehead on Chloe’s.

“I’m fine, okay? Three littles cuts can’t kill me. You’re stuck with me, Beale.” The other woman nodded with her eyes closed, like she was trying to calm herself down. 

“I told you this was a bad idea.” Chloe whispered even though they were alone.

“I know. This won’t happen again. Next time I won’t forget my knife like a dumbass.”

Chloe looked as though she wanted to argue more but she just nodded and pressed a kiss to Beca’s forehead before leaving the room. The brunette watched her go, feeling the tingle of Chloe’s lips on her forehead. 

**7 days before**

These past two weeks had been so boring Beca can’t believe she didn’t die out of boredom. As a way to let her ankle heal, Chloe forbid her from moving so Beca had spent 13 days on the bed barely doing anything. She had read almost every book in the house twice and she hated reading so you can imagine how bored she was. 

The only good thing about this had been Chloe taking care of her. Every day, she gently cleaned Beca’s wounds, making sure they heal right and when she was done she always did the same thing. She pressed a soft kiss on each cut and then one on her lips. It had been a surprise the first time it happened but she had welcomed it. 

Kissing Chloe Beale was Beca’s favorite thing in the entire world. The ginger had soft plum lips and she kissed like a goddess. It had become a thing that they did more often but they never talked about it. Sometimes it was casual kisses like a good morning kiss but other times they spent hours and hours in their bed just making out. 

That’s where they were doing right now until Chloe suddenly pulled away and bit her lip. 

“Tell me where you’re at with the numbers thing.” 

Beca laughed, “the numbers thing? That’s what you call it? The first walker appeared 501 days ago, I lost stacie 275 days ago, I met you 93 days ago and we kissed for the first time 48 days ago.” 

Chloe grinned and kissed Beca’s nose, “You’re such a dork. I can’t believe you remember all of this.” Beca pouted.

“Hey.” 

“I’m just kidding. I love it.” Chloe teased and Beca had to bite her tongue to keep her from saying I love you. 

It’s not like they’re a couple anyways, right? They just kiss each other sometimes as a casual thing because what else is there to do in the apocalypse? So instead of saying something she’ll regret later on, she smiled and pulled Chloe in for another kiss. 

**5 days before**

“Hey Becs, we’re running low on supplies.” Beca looked up from her book.

“Fuck not again. How long do you think we can last with what we have?” 

Chloe checked the cupboard, “Definitely less than a week.” 

Beca sighed and got up, checking their rations. “Okay, I’ll go back in a few days.” Chloe looked at her with a pointed look. 

“With me.” 

“Chlo--”

“With me.” 

“Okay.” Beca gave up and took a sip of her drink to avoid looking at Chloe’s intense stare.

“If I get too hungry in the meantime I’ll just eat you.” The redhead said casually and laughed when Beca choked on her water and started coughing. 

**4 days before**

Turns out Chloe wasn’t joking when she said that and the next afternoon, Chloe looked Beca dead in the eyes and said “I’m hungry.”

Beca frowned, “Okay? I think we have like two cookies left--” Chloe cut her off with her lips. 

Beca came biting her tongue to keep herself from screaming I love you and Chloe had came moaning Beca’s name. 

When Chloe kissed her after everything, Beca isn’t sure she had ever felt this happy. 

**1 day before**

Beca sighed and turned in the bed, her stomach uncomfortably empty. “We definitely have to go get more food tomorrow.” 

Chloe yawned and spooned her from behind and mumbled in agreement. Beca felt a kiss on her shoulder “G’night.”

“Night, Chlo.”  _ I love you. _

**The day of**

Beca was woken up by a trail of kisses on her inner thighs. She opened her eyes lazily and relaxed when she saw red hair sprawled over her lap. Chloe grinned at her and Beca let her head fall back into the pillow, letting Chloe explore her body.

Later, Chloe was buttoning up her jeans when Beca’s stomach interrupted the silence with a loud growl. Beca blushed in embarrassment but Chloe laughed. 

“Alright, grab your pocket knife this time, we’re going shopping!” The ginger said playfully and left to grab her coat and the axe. The girl had grown quite fond of it and she had been practicing with it, excited for the chance to use it. 

As soon as they came out of the house, the stench of death hit them hard and they looked at each other with worry. They had put wood over all the windows so they didn’t know what was happening outside. Everything seemed normal had first glance but they knew something was up. Beca signaled Chloe to go left while she went to the right. Cautiously, she grabbed her pocket knife and made her way to the side of the house. She looked back at Chloe who was clutching her axe walking slowly in the opposite way. 

Beca took a deep breath and peeked her head to see if there was anyone. She sighed in relief when she saw there was no one. She made her way to the backyard, trying to calm her beating heart so she won’t freak out. When she was halfway through the side of the house, she heard a scream. A distinct scream that she would recognize everywhere. She shouted “Chloe!” and ran as fast as she could. She wasn’t prepared for the scene that was awaiting her. 

There were at least a dozen walkers slowly walking towards Chloe, some of them dangerously close. Chloe held her axe in the air and Beca saw her entire body shake. She must have heard Beca arrive because she turned to look at her but Beca’s eyes widened as she saw the closest walker reach over to the redhead.

“Chloe behind you!” Beca shouted and the girl turned while swinging her axe and striked the walker straight on the side of his head.

Beca didn’t waste any more time and ran to Chloe’s side. They didn’t stay close for too long though because the walkers were coming from everywhere. Beca tried to sneak a few glances to make sure Chloe was fine but she was more focused on making sure she didn’t get killed. 

She stabbed a walker, feeling the splash of blood on her face and wiped it just in time to dodge the attack of a walker from her right. The female walker was quick on her feet though and reached again and made Beca dropped her knife. Beca’s eyes widened and saw the mouth come dangerously close to her shoulder until her reflex kicked in and she knocked the walker on the head with the barrel of her gun. While the walker tried to recuperate, Beca managed to grab her knife and swiftly plunged it in the eye. She didn’t have time to take a breather because a hand grabbed her calf and she turned around to see a walker with one leg crawling. Before Beca could react, an axe was smashed on the top of his head and blood exploded everywhere. 

She looked at Chloe who winked at her, “Look at who’s protecting you now.” 

“You’re my savior, Beale.” She put her hand on her heart and smiled sarcastically and Chloe laughed until she was interrupted by a groan coming from behind her.

“I’m gonna go deal with this while you deal with this,” she pointed at something behind Beca. “Don’t die, Becs.” 

“I’ll try.” Beca teased and turned around to deal with the walker coming her way. She heard Chloe grunt behind her but focused on the teenager limping her way. It seemed to be the last one at least so she took a deep breath and got ready for the fight. She dodged a few attacks and the walker did the same and finally Beca managed to push it to the ground.

“I fucking hate teenagers.” She said and plunged the knife in his eyes. The walker grunted and then Beca felt his body stiffen and then relax and that meant he was officially gone. She wiped sweat of her forehead and sat down next to the body. She looked over and saw Chloe on the ground… clutching her arm? 

She raced to her and when Chloe saw her, she smiled and blood spilled out of her mouth. 

“Hey Becs.” Chloe said and didn’t even bother to wipe the blood.

“Chloe what happened?” She tried to reach to touch the girl’s arm but Chloe moved.

“Nothing, Becs. Let’s go grab some food. I’m starving.” She tried to get up but she felt too weak so she stayed down. 

“Did you get bit?” Beca asked with a shaking voice and Chloe didn’t answer and just laid her back on the frozen ground.

“Look at the clouds, Becs. They look like cotton candy.” 

“Chloe show me your arm.” Beca said, not bothering to look at the sky. 

Chloe ignored her again, “You know I always liked the night sky better but this is good too.” With her uninjured arm, she reached and pulled Beca down by the wrist. 

“Are you okay? Did you get bit?” The DJ repeated.

Chloe turned to look at her, “You’re prettier than both the stars and the clouds you know?” Beca felt her heart break at the words. 

“Chloe--” Her voice cracked and Chloe shushed her with a finger on her mouth. 

“It’s okay. Look at me. I’m fine.” 

“Your arm--”

“Hey Becs.” Chloe interrupted her, “You didn’t die. I’m proud of you.” 

Chloe winced and shifted. The hand clutching her arm was covered in dripping blood. Beca didn’t have a problem with blood until that very moment, knowing the blood belonged to Chloe. She felt like she was going to faint. 

“Becs.” Beca looked back at blue eyes. “You need to get out of here. I’m gonna take care of myself. I’m not gonna ask you to do anything.” 

The brunette shook her head like a mad man, “No, I’m not leaving you here. You said you wouldn’t let me go by myself again.” 

The ginger gave her a sympathetic smile and let go of her injured arm to cup Beca’s face. “I changed my mind.” 

“I’m not leaving without you. I-- I love you.” The words spilled out of her mouth before she could control them. 

Chloe just smiled, “I was wondering when you were going to tell me. Come on Becs, you gotta leave now.” She made Beca get up and the latter saw it took all the strength in her body to do it and the older woman was weak now. 

Beca leaned down to kiss her one last time, to remember what it felt like to have Chloe Beale’s lips in between hers. To feel Chloe’s tongue poking out and sliding into her mouth. Chloe pulled away first and smiled. “I love you too, you know. Since the first time I saw you.” She chuckled to herself, “Aubrey always told me I fell in love too fast. When did we see each other for the first time again?” 

Beca gulps and stammered, “Today is the hundredth day.” Chloe grinned.

“How poetic.” 

Beca’s bottom lip was trembling as she saw Chloe trying to keep her smile but it was getting more difficult, pain shooting through her body probably. Chloe waved her off and Beca took one last look at her. Admiring her red hair, her blue eyes, her beautiful smile and her soft lips. Beca let one tear fall from her eye before wiping it off. She turned her back to Chloe and made her way to the motorcycle, feeling the ginger’s stare on her. Without looking back, she drove away.

Less than 30 seconds later, she heard the gunshot and she nearly crashed the vehicle but maintained her course, tears falling out of her eyes so fast she couldn’t control them.

Chloe Beale was gone and Beca felt as though the world had officially ended now. 

**5 days after**

Without really meaning to, she found herself back at the Barden university. She knew it was dumb to go back since there were probably walkers lurking everywhere inside. She sat down on her motorcycle and admired the outside of the building. She fell in love with Chloe in this very building and she didn’t even know it at the time. In the midst of an apocalypse, Chloe had burst into her life and brought her Heaven with Hell on earth. It was getting harder to remember all the countdowns in her head. The only ones she remembered were 287 since she lost Stacie and 5 days since she lost Chloe. 

Beca was alone once again. 

She drove to the grocery store where she had met her. The stupid store was in an even bigger mess than they had left it but if she concentrated hard enough, she could hear it. 

_ “I’m Chloe. Chloe Beale. I don’t even know how to thank you.” _

She sighed. Her heart was aching, her legs were weak and her head was pounding. Chloe had brought sunshine into Beca’s life and how was she supposed to go on without it? She made eye contact with the door that lead to the backroom. The exact place she had met the redhead. Letting a tear fall on her face, she pushed the door open only to be met with a gun to her forehead.

“Woah!” Beca lifted her hands in the air and looked at the blonde woman in front of her.

“Who the fuck are you?” The stranger hissed and Beca looked at the gun on her forehead.

“Who the fuck are you? Do you make a habit of pointing a gun at strangers?” 

“Only the ones dumb enough to sneak into here without making any noise. I thought you were a zombie.” 

“Well I’m not so can you put the gun down? Jesus Christ.” Beca said, annoyed and the girl put it back in her pocket and analyzed Beca.

“Ear monstrosities aside, you look okay so I’m going to let you go without making you give me all your food.” 

Beca rolled her eyes, “Well thanks for that.”  _ God, I miss Chloe. She’d be able to keep me from punching this bitch.  _

“Excuse me?” The blonde woman uncrossed her arms and oops, had Beca said that out loud? “Chloe? Chloe who?”

Beca furrowed her brows, “I don’t see how that’s any of your business.”

The stranger sighed and tapped her foot, “Just answer the question.” 

“I don’t even know who you are.” Beca said. Chloe was her own little memory now, she didn’t want to go around telling people about her. A selfish part of Beca convinced her Chloe was hers and hers only. She only existed in her mind now.

“Just tell me if you were talking about Chloe Beale.” Blondie said and Beca’s eyes widened and looked at the girl.

“Wait are you-- Fuck what was her name. Audrey?” 

The woman rolled her eyes and extended her hand, “I’m Aubrey Posen. We need to talk.” 

Beca looked down at her hand and hesitated a bit before shaking it. 

“Beca Mitchell. I think we do.” 

**Author's Note:**

> Hah. Hope you guys liked it and I didn't make you cry. 
> 
> I started this fic over a year ago, wrote half of it and never finished it. I found it again a week ago and tried to finish it. It turned out alright I think. Let me know in the comments!
> 
> You can find me on twitter @chloebeaie


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